ATWOOOD XXXIX - May 1-3, 2009

Dear Duffers;

BAILOUT ? BAILOUT ?---------The Committee don’t need no “stinkin” Bailout. Because of simple accounting procedures like “Cash in-Cash out” the Tournament always starts the year with a “0” balance and ends the year with a “0” balance. No sub-prime mortgages, No troubled Banks/Financial Institutions, No worry about job cut backs, salary freezes, or suspended 401k matches.

ATWOOD LIVES ON ! AND IT LOOKS BIGGER AND BETTER !

In fact, President Obama has asked The Committee for advice on how to help the economy and ease the financial crisis. The Committee has responded in kind:

(1) Any Bailout plan must include the Browns - Money for the “Browns BUS”
(2) The financial crisis doesn’t worry us---------after all our divorces we have no money.
(3) The financial crisis is not affecting us. All our money is tied up in unearned income.
(4) Keep Spending--------Let our grandchildren figure it out !

Surprisingly, we haven’t heard back. However, Rosie’s Uncle, Bernie Madoff has asked to be invited.

The Committee has been hard at work, once again, tinkering with some rule changes to make the tournament even more exciting. Look for these after more small group testing is finished in Jan./Feb. Here’s a quick look at proposed changes:

(1) Each round of golf will now require each golfer to hit at least FOUR (4) drives per round. One each in the first 5 holes. This rule change insures TEAM PLAY.
(2) In the Playoff round the team that has the top point total in regulation play dictates the order of play. So, instead of the same A-D, B-C play, this order can change depending on how a team perceives the matchups.

This will be gone over in more detail in future letters and the Organization Meeting in April.

RULES OF THE ROAD:

(1) Tuition remains the same-$50 covers food and beer/pop and a share of the cost of the entertainment at the Cabin. It doesn’t matter where or with whom you sleep or even if you sleep----it’s $50. Rooms and Cabins have been reserved-call 800-362-6406. You must mention that you are with the Ference Golf Croup and be prepared to name roommates. Obviously, rooms and cabins are at your expense. By the way, there are no rooms available Thursday night. I guess fans are getting there early to watch the Tournament.

(2) The Tournament will commence Friday morning (shotgun start at 11:00am) and continue through Saturday. The Cabin has been reserved through Sunday morning. Get there early if you want to practice BEFORE the Tournament begins.

(3) For those of us who actually stay for the ENTIRE festival, PLEASE lend a hand in cleaning up the Cabin and grounds. That’s done early Sunday morning (8:00-9:00am) not 11:00am. Those of you who leave early can help by picking up the Cabin on Saturday and by not being complete assholes on Friday night. REMEMBER, YOUR MOM ISN’T COMING-------HELP OUT!

(4) Send entry (money) to: The Committee, c/o John Ference, P.O. Box 41296, Brecksville, Ohio 44141. For the record, checks made out to “The Committee” are hard to explain-------John Ference works/

(5) ONCE AGAIN, BECAUSE OF NUMBERS, ALL MONEY MUST BE RECEIVED BY APRIL 1, 2009. THE FIRST 56 IN, GET TO PARTICIPATE, IF YOU’RE LATE YOU’RE AT THE MERCY OF THE NUMBERS/

(6) And as always, if you have any questions, comments or suggestions------------Don’t bother to mention them or better yet, DON’T COME.


Insincerely,
X
The Committee


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